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Cabin Sketches

by Detectives

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1.
Hälsingland 04:41
Words are scratched up on the walls from another life. The old menus reminds you of chores that now are done. The kitchen sink, the stone furnace doesn’t get much use at all. Where is the ambition? Bags of flour, old pots and pans, all left undisturbed here in Hälsingland. The sun won’t set, its summer time in the cabin house. Right by road, car buzzing by doesn’t seem quite right. A bitter taste of last years harvest, we picked the bushes clean, but never ate the jam. Some things get done, and others not. I love it though, here in Hälsingland. Start cleaning out, this house was made for having guests over. They traveled by, got served some pie and a pot of brew. The dust on windows, the dead flies too, reminds you the times that were. A simpler life, all is rushing by, things change here to, here in Hälsingland. Shave my face. My daughter laughs. She wants to grow a beard when she gets old. Nothing seems to make her mad. Serenity’s good for the soul I’m told. Eat breakfast late or not at all. Forget which day it is. I grow more fond of pace and life. Been here many times before. Hälsingland. Gravel roads and bicycles, dust everywhere must wash my face. Kiddie pool with some kids in it, green grass and a blue sky. They complement each other like beer and my dry throat. But where is the ambition? Take what earth is giving. It’s giving more than plenty in Hälsingland. The weather’s gray but air is warm, let’s go for a swim anyway, why not? Places marked by memories. Nostalgia is sweet but also, merciless in a sense I know. Truth can sting some too. Sunday anxiety. Back to work. Behind the wheel in in a car done by Le Quemant. They never learn, and nor do I, up in Hälsingland. You really should not care, ‘cause you’re in Hälsingland. Nothing changes, all has changed in Hälsingland.
2.
Babygirl 03:12
When you start to act resentful and ignore them. You won’t pick up when your mother calls your phone. You’re tired from a night out with friends, quite a bit hungover. Can I come visit? Can I come visit, baby girl? There’s a room full of smoke, some would call it disgusting. But it’s a part of youth you don’t wanna miss, no no. Don’t diss your parents invitations, they beg you open up. Can I come visit, ohhh ohhh? Can I come visit, baby girl? Singers in the nightclubs, shitty people. Shitty singers, nightclub crooners, bad bartenders. They all want restitution now now now. Beg for mercy or flee. Beg for mercy or flee. Your pain, your fury, aim towards the right source. Drastically words can spit out quick and rough. Well patting on your head’s the last thing we wanna do. A diamond does not grow under barstools. Can I come visit? Can I come visit, baby girl? Children play at playgrounds, dogs on a quick stroll. Flowers on the balconies, sunset, ten pm. He wants to come over, just for breakfast. He’ll bake you bread just like when you were young. Can I come visit? I wanna visit, baby girl.
3.
He has bought all the gear and he’s dressing the part well. Walk around with his hair, a bit windblown yet fine. Rough around the edges. Writes some words, shuts the door and records. His vocal cords don’t hold up. Where are the feelings now? Where is the heartache we want? Produce something that will make mundane fun. Where can I vomit? Where can I spew out my guts? This paper looks nice. Can I write down my thoughts? So what if it’s something that you might have heard before? I don’t care if your brain deserves better. Everyone knows he’s no Bob Dylan. Negativity city, pessimistic countryside. What’s left to salvage in this forlorn house? Not me, nor my wife, nor my daughters. Let’s make a toast for the ones who deserve it! Got things to say, but not the balls to say it out loud. Can I decide once my inebriation is gone? Just to get things straight his short answer is “no”. But if you keep asking, he might say “yeah” Yours to keep forever.
4.
Doctor Up! 02:04
Doctor up my head, my bed is a mess. Doctor up my thoughts when they don’t behave well. The water, wind, the sun all take me in account. This time I’m right, Oh oh. Groomed to perfection, a beautiful bust. Rented a tuxedo, cause I knew I wanted you. I took my car, drove through the streets, kept looking for your you. Once upon a time I was a man with some ambition. Once upon a time I turned to the great oceans. Once upon a time I knew that I wanted you. Walked on water, ate the fire, I took a shot. Doctor up the streets, they look a bit worn to me. Doctor up yourself with some help from friends. The stories you heard were fake to begin with. Once upon a time I was somebody to count on. Once upon a time I traveled far but learned nothing. Once upon a time I crashed a wedding reception. Your man in the aisle, the honeymoon, I took a shot. So what if you already have a man by your side? Get a divorce and clean up your act. “Its adultery”, they say. Do you care what the peasants utter? Once in a life time the sun and moon align. Once in a life time blood boils and explodes. Once in a life time you meet someone like me. You and I were meant to be together.
5.
Trickle down, it follows your spine. The sweat drips and soaks your shirt. Ointment for burns. Dehydrate and return, to where people come to rest. We accept no cards out here in the archipelago. Leave your watch on the boat a sign said. A bit smug I know you’re thinking, but it also makes sense in a way. During rush hour, the boats are packed, with stag parties on a crash course. You and I sit in the back, holding hands and watching people vibrate. You did your best to squirm out of my grip. Some people just don’t deserve love. The discomfort of being to close, is bittersweet I know. There you stand, just staring blindly. You are a waxwork of yourself. Parents buy ice cream for their kids, they respond by squealing like pigs. But surely nothing’s gonna get worse than the things that have already been. Did I mention they responded by squealing like pigs? And you did not respond at all. The crust of earth is sweating, inside it’s boiling hot as you know. And now the sun is helping out also, to dry out what is left. Transport that cost a fortune. Saw a girl who once loved me. Self doubt and a splash of bad judgement, can ruin good things fast. But the inner me wants a piece, he wants to come out more than he has. Somethings are made to be hidden, while others are up for display. There is just enough for all of us. We are all filled to the brim with excitement. You grinned in a way, like you didn’t mean it. With you I could never tell. Phoned you in Copenhagen. I rang from Amsterdam. It’s true, the satellites help us feel close. But only for a short while. All the words wasted, mangled through wires, can you hear me darling? Self medicate. True romance is fake. What was that? You’re breaking up. You looked at me both distressed and relived through the glasses on your face. The tears on your cheek, you had cried for a week. You needed rest. Sought something more than just going to sleep and waking up the next day. Insipid I know you’re thinking but it also makes sense in a way. Don’t you agree?
6.
On Midsummer Eve staying pretty sober Next day on the ferry back to see you. Packing light just a couple of days away The engine of the boat hums. Starting fresh, a clean new slate Bank holiday. Commemorate that summer is here. Used to say I did portraits. Years of wind and water have worn the stones down. There’s not much left, they kind a look like a clenched fist in mid air. I stood and stared. No one really cared or said anything. Starting fresh. A little break. Note to self: Commemorate that life is worth living. You could do much better if you could ignore your head. It goes for walks alone, and leaves you on some bench. Do garden work. Help out some with a boring chore. Give my brother a call. Await the fall. Starting fresh. No angst in heads. New address. Commemorate that you are my woman. Celebrate that we are together after all. There’s more to say, let’s forget about it, no? The date rape drug, drink spiking, some thing I happened to hear by chance. Society makes me depressed. Some dirty motherfucker wants to have it all for himself. Without a consequence. Starting fresh. Sold out myself. No better half. Commemorate that light can bend around a wall A journey north, through burned downed forests. Ash and tree stumps, black and brown wood piles. “I was born next to a road”, you said twice, but I didn’t catch you the first time. And you hate repeating yourself. Starting fresh. Made no success Commemorate that it’s worth a chance after all. It’s very annoying, like a kid arching back. Sought restitution, found nothing. A big gray mass you gotta get through. No clues of colour near. Brought you too tears. Cause you know I’m starting fresh. Words can help, with your expectations. Commemorate that some time has passed Celebrate something.
7.
Back In Town 04:02
I’m gonna go back and tell it how it is. This time people will actually listen. My old high school sweetheart’s gonna hear me out. There’s no doubt. Now that I am back. The stories I bring are gonna overshine the fact that I used to be a pig. I’m Baptised, a changed man. Not a sinner anymore. Caroline is gonna see for herself. I’m bringing gifts from far away. Things I’ve bought that no really one wants. I have made mistakes I know, but I’ve brought some things to make it up. I’m gonna go back and tell it how it is. I left without notice on a train. The smile on their faces when I return. All my old friends are gonna wanna meet up. I shook hands with celebrities. My daughter won’t believe what I have seen. Julie dragged me to the capital, but that’s a chapter I’ve left behind. I’m bringing shit from far away. Things I stole when they looked the other way. I have made mistakes I know, but this time it will be different than before. I wish I could ride in on a horse. What a beautiful entrance that would be. In all honesty, I’m a bit low on cash. You don’t have to worry. I always pay you back. I’m bringing chaos back to town, you said when you saw my face. I have made mistakes I know, but I could really use a lending hand.
8.
More of the same for the ones that care Everybody seem to want despair The questions are written in air Do you really wanna see what’s hiding in there? All you need to do is stare But remember to fill out the questionnaire first Boats and engines, liquor and weed. Some of the things that make up worlds greed. Spew out more shit and breed. More babies means more mouths to feed. Of all problems is that a problem we need? Can we slow down? Live life in a different speed. A goat, a farm, a meadow and a hen. Can you show my wife and I what to condemn? Everywhere we go we live creme de la creme. Tell us if it’s time, you just gotta to say when. The clock ticks, kids, women and men, gather around. Kiss a friend and hug a big tree stem. There’s just not one way to behave. Even though there’s a planet you’re trying to save. These are times when one have to be brave. Crash course in gluttony. What more do you crave? Everybody acts like you were born a slave. I’m sure it’s coming. Another green wave. Fill up you belly, fill up your wife. This world is dangling from the edge of a knife. There’s always some conflict and strife. To be honest there’s really not more to life. If you close your eyes you’re in paradise. Now open them up and watch the sunrise. All you need, willpower and tact. Then maybe spice it up with some blown up facts about hookers, and soldiers and sacked workers in a coal mine. They all just cracked. Tell us how we should act. A request way too abstract for you. But please make it brief. I don’t have all day. I’m fine and you’re fine, but I don’t have all day.
9.
My girlfriends old friends dad got bored His words weren’t his when he said ”no contact from now” My best friends young mom looked so good. With fresh lipstick, powdered cheeks: ”There’s food in the fridge” Menthol smokes and ashtrays Apartments that no one really wanna leave in Poetry for people like you and me Will you admit, there’s beauty in it? My sisters fathers moms new man. His first name rhymed with class, but he was a big sobbing drunk. My doctors wife’s new dentists sons friend, portrayed by this actress old man, jerked off in his bed. Lenses and light and nice posture. A couple of days old nail polish. A kid dropped a tooth, showed his mommy. A mouth chewing spit, there’s beauty in it. My best friends friend of a friends girlfriend, traveled far into foreign lands and stayed there until spring showed its signs. A sobbing kids words filtered through snot. His moms new boyfriend made a scene in the parking lot. Just pay the damn fine. Stuck in traffic all morning. An SUV spewing gasoline. You can’t sell GT’s here on the beach. Show your permit, where’s the beauty in it? My girlfriends old friends dad got bored, his words came out a bit wrong. So I wrote this little song. My kid with a swagger, cap tipped to the side, walks down the streets. Head up high. One way to be proud. You got tricked right from the start. Someone showed interest but then took it back. Your got no more cards to play. This time you’re outwit, and there’s a beauty in it. Truth be told, partially my vault but no one needs to know, know. “You got your vision back”, the doctor says. His wife starts clapping hands. Proud of his man.
10.
All the rain that poured down during those summer weeks were not a sign for what was about to come. It’s just the sky giving back the water it had for lent. Turmoil in the backseat. My daughter strapped with red bites on her legs and screams out loud. The scratches and lotions does not help a damn thing it seems. Where’s the sun hiding? Not in on our heads or behind clouds. It went to sleep and it got quite cold. It’s like it’s telling us you got what you deserve. Mosquito bites. Smoke in the cabin. A bottle of champagne. Spitting toothpaste on the ground. Things makes sense and others not when you’re around. It’s time. It’s here. The sky is finally clear. Dismiss. Enhance. This here might be our last chance. It hurts. It burns. But that is none of my concern. Pale skin on your thigh. You asked me what to apply. Asking questions that don’t have answers when you’re three. That is mine and that is yours. Why is that? Who said what? Was it true or was it not? All the rain that poured down must have been a sign. The autumn stepped right through the door, kicked it in and did not even apologize.
11.
When I first arrived twelve years ago I wanted to be free. Free from my family and the bonds that was built when I was a kid. You rarely called and it didn’t bother me much. I kept myself busy and I guess we did loose touch. The first thing I saw in the city was the globe. My jaw dropped, I was later told. As I stepped out on the streets, up from metro. And that’s why today I do miss you so. We got drunk on a weekday, just to feel what it’s like to be an adult. Left my laptop in the bar, as I stumbled home quite sauced. The next day my blood froze to ice. Started calling all my friends for advice. I got hold of it later, don’t even ask me how. It’s just a stupid story that I wish I could tell you now. All the feelings I have they only seem to grow. That’s why today I do miss you so. Got a bit annoyed that no one visited after a while out here. Was it really so damn hard, to make plans? I Had been here more than a year. But I guess in a way I never really reached out. I can understand now that you were filledf doubt. You were comfortable at home on your vacation. All these years later I still seek salvation. It’s lovely weather outside, I can feel the wind blow. That’s why I do miss you so. Ships pass by my windows view and I wish you could come see me. Point at all the tax-free junkies, on boats far our to sea. Just to hear your voice once more would make my day. Give me five minutes, I know just what I’d say. It plagues me still, though the words don’t mean a thing. Under ground its silent you can’t hear what I sing. Like Phil Elverum I also saw a crow That’s why today I do miss you so

about

All songs recorded live with vocals and guitar during two weeks in June 2019, then later overdubbed. In a cabin in Hälsingland, right by the road.

credits

released May 29, 2020

Ville Krantz plays electric guitar, piano, bass and sings on Back in Town. Malin Timan sings on Back in Town.

Elin Bäckgren sings on Babygirl and Short Answer Is No.

Glenn Lindberg plays everything else.

Stort TAAAAAAACK för hjälpen!

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Detectives Sweden

Two people making sweet sugary mellifluous music.

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